The City of Luuurve...No, Not Paris.

The City of Luuurve...No, Not Paris.

Okay, this is the blog I have been meaning to write for a very long time. It's quite a delightful little blog, if I may say so myself. I hope you get a kick out of it.

To start off, as we all know, I HATE couples. They make me gag. I have rarely ever seen a couple that doesn't disgust me. To clarify a few points, I do not hate all couples. Only those couples that just can't BARE to lose contact with each other. Sick. Just thinking about it makes me want to upchuck. And, of course, because I feel this way, couples in said couple category always seem to find me. There are definitely cute couples out there.
Couple 1: Gina and Rob. Okay. These two are RIDICULOUSLY adorable.
Couple 2: Satyra and Sterling. I love them. And I just want her to wait and see if it works...just one more year!
Couple 3: Jim and Pam.
Couple 4: Wellllll....potential couple. Lauren and...do I even need to say it? Oh well, I will: Brocky! Three words: Little, hilarious children.
Couple 5: Tanya...I mean Sister Cutler and Uncle Cutler! I think they're cute. Really. Not lying.
Couple 6: See picture. Need I say more?

While there are cute couples, after London, I have realized that there are just too many SICK couples out there. London only enhanced my experience.

Examples of SIIIIICK couples:

Wicked-I was sitting in my seat at Wicked having a grand old time people watching when a couple approached our row and slid in next to me. They started talking and I realized they were both American. I thought "How nice. A couple on holiday together and they're out on a date. That's great." FALSE. Not great. I left momentarily to buy a program to keep as a souvenir and then returned to my seat to find a couple heavily engrossed in a steamy make-out session. With ten minutes left until the beginning of the musical, I thought maybe they'd talk or exchange a few quick pecks or something. Boy was I wrong. They went AT it. For the full ten minutes. I turned to Annie and Kristin and pointed out the utter atrocity of it all and the fact that I was gagging. But seriously? In public for more than 10 minutes in front of children? SERIOUSLY!? The play began and like a breath of fresh Idaho mountain air, they stopped to watch. At intermission I turned to Annie to talk to her about the first half of the play only to see her eyes wide and staring past my shoulder at the couple. "Don't tell me." I said. She could only stifle a laugh and nod. I had to look. It's like watching a car accident. You don't want it to happen, but when it does, there's nothing you can do but watch. I could only watch for a few moments because my medulla oblongota kicked in and my primal gag reflex acted up. For the entirety of intermission, they were entangled in one another, completely and utterly and blissfully in love and oblivious to the crowd surrounding them. I was dying of course and said a little prayer of thanks when the show started again and they ceased their...ahem...loving of each other.

Example 2:

The Tube-The London underground is a marvelous place. Full of magic and wonder. You can go ANYWHERE you want, whenever you want (as long as it's between the time of 4 a.m. and midnight). However, the underground is a breeding place for young couples passionately in love. The worst part is that most of them are like, 14 and 15 year olds. Though I witnessed this affection on multiple occasions, one in particular stands out in my mind. I got on the Circle Line with Annie to go somewhere and play. It was a particularly busy day and the Tube was packed and slightly stinky and sticky. I was forced to stand and hold the little yellow bar at the top of the car. After I squeezed into a spot and grabbed the bar before the train lurched forward, I looked up. Right at a couple. They couldn't have been older than 16. And boy, were they liking (no, not licking, LIKING...stop it Kaccee) each other. Like at Wicked, I couldn't look away for a moment. I finally turned to Annie who was DYING laughing. She finally choked out "I wish you could have seen your face when you first saw them. Your eye's got huge and your nostrils flared!" Then she broke down laughing again. I said, "But seriously!? SERIOUSLY? What would possess them to do that!?" Annie shrugged and laughed again. "You always seem to find them. Or maybe they find YOU." She busted up again and pointed to them, tongues and lips still working. I couldn't look. I just stared straight ahead and waited till they got off. As they went up the escalator, I saw them snuggle up and watched him put his hands in her back pockets. This set Annie off again and I just about fell over laughing too. (note: this is not the couple...I wish I had a picture of that...hilarious)

This is the part of the blog where I make a vow. I will never EVER be half of a sick nasty couple that does things like that. That is all I have to say about it.

I guess I can give a quick update. My apartment rocks, my roommates are pretty awesome (but let's be honest, they have a lot to live up to, kind of an impossible task), and my classes are good. I'm hunting for a job and I ate a polish from J-Dawgs today. And I am done now.